tired.........

I’m tired.

I feel the moment again.

Moment? Or sense of absence of belongingness?

Idiot!... stupid!...

Worthless... that's what I am.

Pretending to be worthy I am but…

At the end it’s just a front.

The worthless real me still emerge each end of time.

 

11:45am

10-04-2010

Hey!... will you stay out of my mind!

You'll just make me weak and hopeless.

I know, I made a mistake, if it is really a mistake.

But its have been done and I can’t make it again.

Never. I can do nothing about it.

I need you to stay out in my mind.

Will you?...

crazy me...

An old friend.
There's nothing to worry.
Just ignore people around you.
So what if at this age...* ***** *** *** ***

I hate you!
I really do!

Why don't you-people, stay away from me.
I don’t need you! I can do things without you!
Things more than you know.
I don’t need someone to be with me always.
I miss the idea and pleasure of doing things alone.
Don’t you get it!

I HATE YOU!

I HATE YOU!

Trying to fight the feelings, feelings that I know was right.
But, even though it was right I don’t want it.
It made me realize, I’m alone.
Nobody cares and I alone must stand on my own.

I hate you, for you feel the feelings that others don’t.
I hate you, for being sensitive and considerate.
I hate you, for you were seized by those feelings.
I hate you, for being loser, loser for having the right feelings that seems so wrong.

I hate you!!!...
And the feelings that I felt in that situation.

8:53 PM
25-02-2010

stop doing it...
make the things you have to do tonight...
you are given enough time and a day of chance to accomplish it...
make it done tonight...
or regret tomorrow...
fight!...those temptations in your way...


11:31pm
18-02-2010

...foolishness...

I miss someone that I never have been…
Am I stupid? Crazy? Or just dreaming?...
I don’t know… It’s hard… I thought I can manage it…
All the way and continue the way as I did…

I realize that things are just there…
Ignore it and you won’t notice it…
Appreciate it and you will like it...
Reject it and it seems it doesn’t exist...

I don’t know how to react with this because I’m afraid…
Afraid to the things that I don’t recognize and see at all…

Or maybe, to the things that I know would probably occur...

9:43pm
9-02-2010

one down....

yes!!!!!!!!!!!!!!...

yesterday we already finished our accounting project (accounting system!!!) ...

a good start.... i guess...

and i hope....

...a good start will end well...